Sunday, July 7, 2013

Damage I've Done


I am 26 years old body is 42 years old because of years of obesity and neglect. My health insurance offers a free health assessment online. When I completed the assessment it told me I am actually 42 years old because of my own lifestyle. That sucks....
I can't believe that just because of what I eat and don't do as far as exercise makes me only 8 years younger than my own my mother actually is. 
Recently I've seen two pictures of myself that just make me want to scream. I am still sitting at 240lbs. It just seems like my body is bigger than it was. 
FORTY time I take the assessment I want it to be younger than my actual age. I need to cut 100 lbs off my body and 16 years off my "age". 
I want the left side...determination and hard work are needed.
Strength over time equals power.

Saturday, April 6, 2013


Well hello April! How I've missed you! I love April. So many good things this month. Many of my family members have birthdays this month and mine is on the 30th. 
I went to the doctor at the end of March and had a physical. It was not pretty. As we all know, I am considered morbidly obese for my age and height. My BMI is around 47%. My cholesterol is so high that she has put me on a low carb, low sugar, low fat diet and bonus my thyroid is low so I have to go to an endocrinologist. I will find out the exact numbers for my cholesterol on Monday I hope. I hate hate hate myself for still being so overweight that I am a heart attack waiting to happen and I'm only 25!!!! I mean wtf is wrong with me that I can't get my head out of my ass, my car out of the drive through and the soda out of my hand to get this shit done and be healthy??? It's all I've ever wanted and for some reason I can't get it done. I don't have a choice anymore. To keep myself from having a massive heart attack I have to do what I know is right and good for me. 
any ass kicking advice?? go for it in the comments!

Friday, March 29, 2013


Well that was a really long hiatus! Sorry guys been dealing with some family things.
I recently left my husband of almost six years to be on my own. It has been a long 3 months. Lots of ups and downs and craziness. I am happy to report that even with all the craziness of the past few months I have not gained any weight. I will add that I have not lost any either, I'm very happy I have no gained any. 
Now that I've been living on the THIRD floor of my apartment complex for about a month I have noticed that all my clothes are a little big...even the panties. My legs have thinned out and look leaner. My arms are stronger just from carrying things up and down the stairs every day. I've been on my own for a month now. It hasn't been easy and I expect that it won't be for a while however, I'm ready to put exercise back in my routine. I need to get myself on a schedule. Hopefully it will help with the emotions and mood swings too. 
Not exactly a happy update but just wanted ya'll to know I'm still kicking.